Question:
WHY DIDNT THIS WORK FOR ME ?
I don't know what to do - i started out at 329 on 3/16/01 and i am still at 239 - why can't I lose more weight - why can I eat ANYTHING ! Why don't I feel full ?? I wanted to be at 150 - Can I take diet pills ??? HELP !!! I am VERY depressed about this ....thank you — Rachel B. (posted on November 16, 2002)
November 15, 2002
I find it interesting that you are complaining that you can eat anything
and are disappointed with your weight loss. Just because a lot of us CAN
eat anything after the surgery does not mean that we should!! The surgery
is a tool to help us control the amount of foods that we consume, we are
still totally responsible for what goes into our mouths. Perhaps you need
to journal your foods and count your calorie intake versus calorie
expenditure. Have you thought of seeing a nutritionist? After a while, the
hunger returns and you may not feel as full as you did in the beginning!
— Carla B.
November 15, 2002
The purpose of this surgery is to help limit your intake and absoption of
food. If it does not do this, then the surgery has failed. If however you
find ways around the surgery, like grazing or drinking with meals so you
can eat more, or drinking sugared beverages, then you have failed the
surgery. Either way, the first thing you have to do is analyse your
eating, then you can find out what you can do from there.
— faybay
November 15, 2002
Rachel, My heart goes out to you. I can understand your feelings of
failure. My advice to you would be to write down everything that you put
in your mouth. Many times we don't have a realistic idea of how much we
are truly eating. Are you eating more than 3 meals a day? Are you eating
your protein first and making that 75% of your meal? Are you exercising
and drinking all your water? Unless you get really honest with yourself
and get back to the basics then you probably won't lose anymore, but, you
can turn this around. Our WLS will not do it for us with out our
cooperation. Just get back on track, hon and it will work!
— YvonneBryant
November 15, 2002
The first place you should start is with your doctor. Once you verify
something is or isn't wrong, then you will know what to do. If something
is wrong, follow your doctors instructions to the letter and get it
corrected. If something is now wrong, then get back to basics. Perhaps a
couple of weeks of liquids like you first did post-op will get your
metabolism back on track. Then stay under the prescribed calorie limit by
your surgeon. Mine says 800 calories. Then make sure you're getting all
your protein in every day and all your water. Do you have a daily exercise
routine? If not get it going. Best wishes. Remember just because you can
eat anything doesn't mean you should. Remember, it's protein first and
foremost, then veggies and fruits and lastly--only lastly carbs.
— Cathy S.
November 15, 2002
Hi Rachel! Perhaps you're on a plateau. For months 7-8 I only lost 5 llbs
- but I dropped from a size 16 to a loose 14 and in some clothes, a 12!
Take your measurements, you might be surprised! I try to not focus on the
scale, and its numbers, and instead on how I feel. If I'm feeling lousy I
look at what I'm eating - did I havea good day or a bad day? Moreover, I'm
thankful for where this surgery has taken me so far, and if the weight loss
were to stop now I would still be very happy with myself and not
disappointed. Hang in there, and remember that this is a journey - it
takes time! Your body may just be "resting" for a bit right now,
which is AOK. If you are very concerned, see your doctor and nutritionist.
Please email if I can be of any more help to you! =) Sarah
— Sarah C.
November 15, 2002
Rachel, I'm sorry- when I read your post I thought you had surgery in March
02, not 01... ooops! So some of my post probably doesn't apply. Hang in
there sweetie, and don't be yourself up! =) Sarah
— Sarah C.
November 16, 2002
Rachel you are not alone in this battle. There are others of us out there
who aren't quite as perfect or strong as others who are able to resist all
temptation and therefore meet and stay at goal. And sorry folks, I feel
that those of you who come out with the line "just because you can eat
anything doesn't mean you should" are just as bad (or worse cuz you
should know better!) as the "normal" sized people who used to
berate YOU when you were preop for eating to excess and getting fat in the
first place. Could you have followed your own advice prior to the surgery?
You know the line "just because you can eat that much doesn't mean
you SHOULD"! Sound familiar? Why should it be easier for someone who
is post op who has the same feelings of being HUNGRY as YOU did before you
had surgery?? If I offend any of you, I just can't bring myself to
apologize. Get off your high horse and realize that not everyone has the
strength to live life and succeed only if they deny themselves what others
are lucky enough or strong enough to turn away from. All the good advice
in the world won't help those of us in the predictament of finding
ourselves unable to maintain saitey like some of you others and feeling
true 'HUNGER'. When you make that statement, all you succeed in doing is
making those of us, like Rachel and myself, feel BAD AND ONCE AGAIN, LIKE A
FAILURE unlike YOU. Give me a break. Ok now I'm off MY high horse.
Rachel, I'm with you honey. It IS just as hard to stop eating postop when
you do not feel satisfied/full as it was when you were preop. I too can
eat anything without problem. I too wanted to be at 150 lbs and am sitting
at 188 (from 313) 15 months postop. Perhaps your dr. can give you advice
on the type good vs. bad appetite suppressants out there that you could use
in conjunction with working with a nutritionist. If you are like me, you
hate to exercise. For the last couple of weeks I have been trying to
increase the number of calories I burn with "unofficial"
exercise. I park as far away from my destination as possible (when it's
light out of course). I use the steps instead of the elevator most of the
time now. I make myself get out of my house on weekends so that I am not
tempted to sit here and graze, and instead walk the malls (which does burn
calories!). I stand up at work when I'm doing certain tasks instead of
sitting at my desk (standing burns more calories than sitting :0) ). I do
try to keep my calories at 1800 a day which is a struggle for me, but
anything less I feel like I am STARVING, weak, shakey, and as though my
body is feeding on itself. My sister (rny 12/01) and I started a support
group at our local wellness center and we meet with a group of about 10
women every two weeks which is great with helping me keep things in
perspective and seeing "real" posties who, like me, aren't
"perfect". I really hope this helps. If you'd like to email me,
please don't hesitate.
— Diana M.
November 16, 2002
Kudos to Diane. I LOVE your response... I think that many new postops or
the pre op researchers think that they know all about long term issues from
what they've read. Unfortunately, they never lived it. No offense
intended here but the first response was typical. This person didnt even
have the surgery yet! I was just like you all. "Oh she grazed, she
sabatoged herself, she must drink milk shakes 24/7". Listen, I joined
this site when there were a mere 16,000 members. How many are there now?
How many Michelle Curran's are out there that are so successful 5 years+
down the road? My point is that I'd be willing to bet my savings account
that there are many people out there that are embarrassed because they
think they've failed. And I am sorry but responses from those that havent
lived it and dont really know what they are talking about or talk without
compassion, make these people feel even worse. I know that you think you
know, just as I did, but you don't. It's almost like watching the events
of 9/11 on TV opposed to seeing it live, or smelling the fire 2,3,4 or more
days later or knowing 5-10 people that died. Please think before you make
judgements on these so-called "failures". This condition is
fragile enough without (albeit, unintentional) hurtful comments.
— Jeannet
November 16, 2002
From what I understand about RNY, this problem is not unusual. My surgeon
does a lot of revisions to DS from various other WLS's because of the
long-term failure of those surgeries. YOU are not the problem, the surgery
is! A lot of people deal with extreme hunger and end up dieting again. Ugh!
Depending on your BMI you may qualify for a revision to DS. Go to
http://gr-ds.com for info. If you do decide on a revision, please pick a
surgeon who does a lot of them, as they are complicated. There is probably
someone closer to you than California, but this is a good place to start.
In fact, the office would be happy to recommend someone near you, I'm sure.
They are wonderful people! Talk to Dee, she's great.
— Chris T.
November 16, 2002
Please stop beating yourself up. You didn't fail...the surgery did. Let's
face it...the whole point of this surgery is to reduce our ability to eat a
lot of food by reducing the size of our stomachs. If we could always choose
to eat smaller portions, who in their right mind would choose to undergo
major surgery, and forever alter our bodies so that they don't function
normally? The fact that you don't feel full says it all. This surgery also
failed for me. I too can eat any size portion, never dump, and never
vomit. At first, I beat myself up, thinking I was doing something wrong. At
six weeks out, I ate an entire personal pan pizza, and didn't even feel
full. After a lot of research and posting on this web site, I came to
understand that I most likely have an enlarged stoma, which allows the food
I eat to immediately enter my intestines, not staying in my pouch,
therefore, not making me feel full. There is surgery to correct this, but
it is rarely performed and has a high rate of failure. After a lot of soul
searching and pity parties, I made the decision to NOT pursue medical
intervention, and instead, made the choice to voluntarily eat less. I
stopped beating myself up, stopped reading profiles on this site (if I hear
one more person say how they get full on three bites of food, I swear I'll
scream) and stopped obsessing over the whole thing. I certainly haven't
lost as much weight, or as fast, as others, but in 11 months, I've lost 95
pounds, with about 20 more to go. I feel better than I have in years, and
look better. Am I skinny? No...and I don't expect I ever will be. Instead
of concentrating on the negatives, I focus on the positives. Talk to your
doctor. Find out if there is anything medically they can do. If not, or the
risks don't outway the benefits, then look inside yourself and decide how
you can help yourself either become thinner or accept yourself as you are.
Believe me, I do understand how upsetting and frustrating it is to know
that our "last resort" failed, to know that we are in the very
small minority of people this surgery doesn't work for. I know it helped me
to know I wasn't alone. As for your question about diet pills, while I
would never "recommend" this to someone else, I will tell you
that I take Metabolife to help control my hunger and give my metabolism a
boost. I take only 3 pills a day, first thing in the morning, and rarely
take them on the weekends (to give my body a rest). Not knowing your health
or medical condition, I couldn't tell you if this would help you, but there
are products out there that don't have ephedra, making them relatively
harmless. Good luck....and don't give up.
— Cyndie K.
November 16, 2002
Jeanne and Diane I whole heartedly agree with your responses. I am not a
long term post op but don't think that Rachel is a failure. Sometimes it
is hard to hear answers from people who are pre op about what I should be
doing post op. I think they have the best of intentions. It is like
someone who has never had a baby, telling you how to give birth.
Rachel, hang in there.
— tulagirl
November 16, 2002
Have you kept a food diary and see your nutronist. Things like drinking
Juice in excess quanties can stall the loss. How much exercise are you
getting? sEEN YOUR SURGEON? wHAT DOES HE SAY? Geetting in enough liquids?
Theres lots of struff to investigate before calling surgery a
failure,please tell us more
— bob-haller
November 17, 2002
Hi - I was reading your profile and noticed you have a relationship with
food...you called it your friend. I would suggest that before you spend
money on diet pills, that you spend it on therapy to find out if you are
unintentionally sabatoging your efforts. Good luck!
— [Deactivated Member]
November 17, 2002
Rachel,
First, let me say congratulations on the pounds you have lost. How is
your overall health? Do you feel better? Have more energy? Off of any
medication? Are you a more active participant in your life? If you have
answered "yes" to any of these questions then the surgery has
worked for you. I feel that many get caught up in the "goal
weight" and skinny mind set that has plagued the morbidly obese. Even
thought I have lost 147lbs from my heaviest weight, and coming up on 18
months post-op, I have not yet reached 200lbs. Do I feel like a failure?
No way, because I have my health and my life back. My thoughts are with
you.
— Pamela B.
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