Question:
Has anyone seperated from their spouse before WLS?

I need to know how you handled this situation. I am really contemplating a divorce after a ten yr marriage and three children, but I'm afraid to leave after surgery because of what him and his family might say ("she got the big head after her fat a$$ lost all that weight") Or do I leave before the surgery so they won't have anything to say. I know it should not matter what anyone says, but I really want to make the right move with out feeling guilty.    — mischief85 (posted on March 7, 2002)

March 7, 2002
First of all it doesn't really matter what you think they will say most people will say something no matter how you choose to handle it. This is strickly my opinion mind you I am no expert. You really didn't say why you were comtemplating leaving him, is it related to the weight issue or just grown apart?? Not really asking these questions for a answer just for you to ask yourself. You have to do what will make you happy. And ask yourself if this marriage can be saved or not and what would really make yourself happy. You can't stay together just for the kids or because this one or that one will say this and that. Do what is right for you. And if you do choose to leave don't let people or youself for that matter tell you that you are hurting your kids. THe saying goes and is very true If you are not happy neither will they be. Do some soul searching and know what is best for you before you do anything though and remember that sometimes the grass looks better from the other side until you get to the other side. If you love him and have issues I would try to work them out first but again Do what is best for you and your well being. Don't worry so much about who is saying what. After all they don't have to walk in your shoes
   — Debbie H.

March 7, 2002
hon a break up is an emotional thing for all involved it can be emotionally draining your going to be going throgh so many emtional as well as physical changes with wls your energy is going to be low at first it may be to stressful at that time to be dealing with the childrens emotions and everyone elses for that matter you of coarse need to make the decision thats right for you but my advice would be grin and bear it for now have surgery ge your health back in order this way your better prepared to deal with it bestof luck to you
   — [Anonymous]