Still Struggling after 2 years

amy1976
on 8/27/06 10:54 pm - Sierra Vista, AZ
RNY on 09/07/04 with
I was wondering if there was anyone out there still struggling after 2 years? I had many complications from my surgery so this proberly has not helped I went from 400 to 187 but still feel like i am 400lbs I just reecentley had a tummy tuck but this has not helped. Also seeing a counseler its helped a little but i thought talking to my peers would be better any suggestions would be helpful thank you
GloryGirl
on 8/29/06 3:45 am - Columbia, MO
I do know what you mean. I have gone from 391 to 214 and yet I still feel like I'm up at 391 many times. It helps me to notice the little things. Like Sunday we went to eat at Country Kitchen in Columbia. Walking in to the restaurant there is a poll with a space between it and the building. In the past I have started to walk through there and realized I wouldn't fit so walked around. Sunday I walked through there with room to spare. Last week, I had to buy new underwear because even the ones that were three sizes below where I started are too big. I was able to buy a size large outfit and it fit! I am able to walk much longer when I go shopping with my daughter. My theory is that we want the inside to change as much as the outside, but it takes longer for our minds to get around the fact that we have lost weight and that we do look different now. People relate to us differently. I was watching Oprah the other day and she had a show about class distinctions in America. They had interviewed people saying what they thought indicated someone was lower class. One lady said if someone was extremely overweight she automatically assumed they were lower class. That really made me stop and think. This is a preconceived idea that happened before I even opened my mouth or said or did anything. Because I was in the morbidly obese category i was thought to be a lower class individual. One older gentleman at a place I used to work told me one day, "You're smarter than you look." He was being funny and I don't think he meant anything by it, but it's a statement that has stayed with me all these years. Did people think I was stupid because I was extremely overweight? In addition, I believe I had bought into their lies. I had begun to believe these things about myself. Now, I have to re-order my thinking. But, I'm still the same person inside so it will take initiating some new experiences. I plan on taking a creative writing class next semester. I recently took a quilting class. I'm trying to go to more support group meetings. I'm forcing myself to be different, to not stay holed up in my house and do nothing bu****ch tv and read. I also feel that in some ways, I am grieving the loss of food. It was a friend for years. When I would sit and watch tv and/or read, I would eat and eat and eat. This combination was a favorite past-time. Now, I'm finding if I read, I need to find a new place to do it so I won't be tempted to eat at the same time. And, I just made an appointment with a psychologist I've seen years ago. I figure, an experts opinion on what has happened to me and what is happening to me can't hurt. Let me know how it's going. I'd like input from others on this topic as well. I've seen all kinds of reactions to weight loss surgery from becoming a night club addict to getting a divorce and changing your life to becoming more fulfilled. Of course, I would prefer the latter.
Doreen
on 8/29/06 10:52 pm - Coshocton, OH
RNY on 09/01/04 with
I understand what you are going thru. I started at 474 and am now at 237. I have lost half my size but find I can sometimes eat more then I could in the beginning and then I get these guilt feelings. I feel as if I will never reach my goal weight. I had a remedial thigh lift done due to the excess skin hanging and hoping for another one soon to at least make my legs look a bit more normal. I think that is some of my problems. I used to feel so freakish when I was huge that it is hard for me to feel normal. I can see major differences in clothing sizes and in things I can do now that I could not do before. So I try to focus on that. If you feel like talking, email me anytime. Just remember how far you have come from this time 2 yrs ago. Good luck! Doreen 474/237/?
KGSlaugh
on 11/11/06 12:26 am
I know this post was from a while back, but i often feel the same. i have lost 0ver 100lbs, but when i look in the mirror i still feel like i see the same person...perhaps it is that i have truly not changed on the inside the way i needed to... You know...to understand why i was eating myself to death anyway. I am seeing a counselor right now that i really like to work on this. Feel free to email anytime! -KT =)
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