So lost and off track

Ok, I really have lost time.  I was last seen in PCP's office the end of Oct.  From that point I have been flying back and forth from Fl to Ohio so much to take care of mom and dad that I really lost time. 

I weighed 255 in her office yesterday which means I have only lost 10 freakin pounds since last week of October.  I cried so hard and she set with me for an hour.  She put me on Celexa because she said I have been thru Hell and was still going thru it and I was severely depressed. 

I am 15 months out now and I need to loose 55 pounds for goal and go have my pani removed.  My hernia are already becoming a problem.  I have been upping my protein and have successfully kicked the pepsi habbit.  I drink diet caffene free MD, Dr. Pep and Mug root bear and its great. 

I am suffering over the loss of my dad and taking care of my mother from afar.  Everything feels so wrong suddenly and I feel like I did when the lap band quit working for me.  I am not gaining wt.  I have lost more inches also. 

Is there a good side to this.  I have to stop snacking on ritz crakers and cream chs.  Doctor says my depression is causing me to munch all the time.  So now I have to really watch what the heck is going on with this. 

Thanks for letting me cry on you shoulders and please someone tell me its not over and I can finish losing.  I have so much ahead of me that I don't have time to fail at this.  I have to get the wt loss moving again. 

Carla

P.S I want to be in onderland so bad.

Really big hugs Carla. I know how you feel.

Don't think that you can't lose weight after your "window". You can. Your doctor is probably right. The stress is causing depression which can cause you to self medicate by comfort eating. I assure you, though, that it is not the end of the world if your weight loss slows now. Take care of your mom and even more, take care of yourself. Make sure you get all your vitamins in. Eat regular meals. Try to keep plenty of high protein snacks on hand to reach for when you need something to snack on.

You won't fail.

Oh, Kathleen
I really thought I was doing ok but right now everything just seems to be pilling up on me but this is day 3 on Celexa.  I did sleep past 3 hours last night and I don't remember if I had any dreams lol. 

I am sitting at McDonalds on the beach right now looking at the Gulf wondering what the heck I am so unhappy about having my decaff coffee with 1/2 & 1/2 and stevia.  I am also having a small plain oatmeal with stevia and butter.  I figured if I was going to have a carb make it a good healthy whole grain early in the day. 

I did not walk over today, I drove.  But I did get up to try to start a new better day.  I am so glad I have all of you here that understand what I am going thru.  I hope this does not last long. 

Depression really does hurt.

Carla

Hi Sweetheart,

I just got off the phone with my therapist and you know what she says to me all the time??? "Depression is fattening"   She's so right.

I'm depressed right now and I want to do nothing but munch.  Munch munch munch.

I hope the Celexa kicks in for you soon.  Keep your chin up!!

Lord I hope so too.  I didn't really think I was depressed until I started isolating and munching all the time.  Hell I wouldn't even go to the beach and everyone knows how much I love the Gulf and white sands of FMB.

This is day 3 on Celexa and I did wake up in somewhat of a better place this AM.  My PCP says I should feel better in about 10 days.

Thank you for your support.

Carla

Just wanted to let you know that all is not lost. I still pre-op but I'm sure others will be along to help.

Aw thank you.  I was so afraid to post my feelings for fear of turning potential pre-ops away from DS when it really is the best thing that ever happened to me besides my children and husband. 

I just think watching my dad die and taking care of everything after on top of waiting to see if I get my seat back in medical school has just laid too much wt on my shoulders right now. 

Carla

 Carla, I hope you will take good care of yourself right now.  Don't forget about going back to basics.  Since life has been nuts for you, keep a food journal.  Keep track of your protein and carbs darlin.  You need the regime right now to help get you back on track.  In fact, get on the bites and vites thread every day to help you!

I am sorry for the loss of your dad.  Hugs to you!

I totally agree with the regimine deall.  I usually look at bites and vites to get ideas of what to eat lol.  I am trying to set a goal to start Monday with weigh in and journel.  I cannot believe I was that far off track but carbs slip in easy and lil bites add up.  '

I want to be in onederland and finish med school so I can take good care of my mom.

Carla

I can relate to how you're feeling Carla. It's good that you recognize what's going on. I use fitday so I have to face what I am eating. When I feel comfortable again I plan to go back to posting on the daily meal thread. Hopefully the meds will kick in. You did something good for yourself by seeking help. Keep it up - you can do this!