Poor support system

I am scheduled for my surgery July 11th.  I had tried gastric banding and it failed.  The band eroaded into my stomach.  I need to lose about 150 lbs to gain my health back.  My family and friend are not happy with me having the surgery and so I will come home from the hopital and be by myself.  Do you think I will be able to take care of myself during the first weeks? 

It is major surgery and if you can have some help when you first get home, I'm sure that would be best. Have you considered having your friend and/or family members go see your Dr. with you? My mother was not happy about my decision to have WLS either, but inviting her to come to the Dr's office and ask any questions she might have did ease her concern and the tension. She wasn't excited about, but was doing better by the time I had my surgery.

Re: support... Support is going to be important in the long term, so if you haven't connected with a local support group, look into doing so as soon as you can. They can help you navigate the myriad of issues that will come up after surgery, including dealing with friends and family that aren't supportive. Of course, OH is a great place to come for support as well, it's important to get some face to face support if at all possible. 

Wishing you all the best,

Absolutely!  This is YOUR battle and you can do it!  It may be an uphill battle at times, but think how great it is going to feel when you have beaten that 150 lbs and are healthy!  Your family and friends will come around - you have to do this for you!

Good luck!

I am having my surgery Tuesday, and I know how you feel.  Everyone is against me having it, but my sister has agreed to come stay with me post op.  It is a major surgery, and you should have someone with you at least the first few days.  Some hospitals have rehab units where you could stay for a few days.  I wish our friends and families realized what a struggle we have already been though.  Good luck to you.

It makes me sad to hear that your family is not supportive of you getting healthy.  However, you have made a decision to do this for you....and your health.  That is what is most important.  Maybe the reason they are unhappy is that they are actually afraid....afraid of what another surgery will do to you.  I think asking them to come along with you to one of your appointments is a great idea.  Maybe they will understand then.  Most fear is brought on by a lack of understanding.  Be patient with them and allow them to learn what exactly it is you are doing and why you are doing it. 

If that doesn't work, look to your friends for support.  There has to be someone out there that understands.  If not, I would let the doctors know that you might need some help after you are released from the hospital.  Everything depends on what you have to do at home I would think.  Do you have kids? Do you have pets?  Do you live in an apartment on a higher level?  I know I'm asking my grandparents to watch my dog for 8 days after my surgery as I live on a second floor apartment and don't think walking up/down the stairs with a dog pulling on me is the best thing to do right away. 

You can take care of yourself as well.  Just plan.  Plan your meals...make sure you have enough stuff in your fridge and cupboards so you don't have to travel for a while.  Have your protein sources ready, your shakes, milk, soy, etc.  Ok, also remember to have things like TP.  :)  It's the little things we forget sometimes. 

Keep coming back here...it's sooo helpful!

The Doctor's office has a support group that I am joining.  My doctor is an hour and a half away but I will ask friend to go.  Thanks I feel better. 

i do know without support , it makes it a diffcult decision to have it in the first place. maybe this friend will stick by you and help you through . i know , i have walked in your shoes. good luck with your surgery and i hope is goes very well for you .

Taking someone with you to the doctor is a good idea.

Maybe you can ask them to accept and respect your decision even if they don't agree with it.  After all, it's your decision.

I would really try to have someone available to help out the first week or so.

If they are against it because the band failed, they should know it doesn't work often.  It's not your fault and it doesn't mean RNY won't work.

You really need someone there to help you, even if you have to pay them.  Also, what if you have a complication, you might need even more support.  I'm only saying that because I didn't expect a complication (I'm young and relatively healthy), but I had one and I'm so thankful for my friends and roommates' help.