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Had my 2 week post op appointment today and I'm down 24.4 lbs since surgery!! I'm moving on to stage 3 and am excited to eat some food!!!

I'm starting to feel great and enjoy this decision.

I know it will get better I truly do know that and I know in a few short months I will be happy I did this but right now I HATE my decision. I have a terrible headache, can't get in my protein, can't get in my liquids, I have runny stools (and two days prior I had the wors constipation). And I'm exhausted! Ugh!! This is going to be hard and I knew it would be hard but I'm very sad today. I miss my previous life. I'm bored at home but I'm too sad to go back to work. How will I ever function normally? Ugh!!

And feeling ok. Not great or even good but not bad. I'm having trouble getting down all of my liquids. The nurse at the hospital told me that liquids are the most important and then protein. I should be drinking 2 liquids to 1 protein. So far today I have gotten in 16 oz of liquids and 8 oz of protein (15 grams). I plan to get in another 16 oz of liquid today and maybe a little more. My pain is well managed as long as I stay on schedule for my pain meds and I'm finally starting to pass some gas.

I can't believe how fast time flies. This really was an easy 2 week pre-op program to follow and I'm feeling great. Don't get me wrong I'm scared out of my mind. Tomorrow will bring on so many challenges and changes in my life... I don't think I can ever be fully ready for what I'm about to embarque on but I'm going to follow through and in a few weeks or even months when the temporary issues are over I will not look back and be so happy I did it!!

I'm crusing right through my pre-op diet without a single cheat. I've even attended a cook out and while it was very tempting I didn't cheat. I felt very successful leaving the party successful. Tomorrow will be 7 full days on the pre-op and will leave 7 days until my surgery! I can't wait...

I see the doctor on Thursday for my last appointment prior to surgery and will have to do my blood tests then it's on! I cannot wait!!!

While I have spent weeks preparing myself for the pre-op diet I wasn't prepared for it to all become so real. It was way overwhelming and I have been a bit emotional today because of it.

I did, however, survive day 1! 13 to go. :) 

I will do this. I can do this. This is the first thing I have done for me and been this determined in my life. I will be a success. Failure is NOT an option.

There's so much to do! I can't believe that in 17 days I will be getting ready to wake up for my surgery date. I have lived basically my entire life fat. I have no idea how I will live my life as a "normal" sized person. And I'm starting to feel very overwhelmed (again) by the idea. I know there will be pain and lots of it. I know I will be scared and emotional. But I'm so excited. I dream about my new life. How odd is that?

I'm not (yet) mourning my old life but I know I will. I will mourn for the big holiday dinners and cakes that I will no longer be able to gorge myself in. I know I will be able to eat these things again in the future but not as much. I wonder how I will ever be able to cope with all that life brings me without McDonald's. So bizarre how my life has been filled with feeding my face to hide my emotions.

I also am so scared as to how this surgery will affect my marriage. My husband and I are good and he's very supportive. But people change as I have experienced far too often in my life. And when someone is no longer the center of attention they start to get weird. But I have to learn to take care of myself. How will I balance that and my marriage?

Life will never be the same after September 6. I'm choosing life over all my food addictions and emotional baggage. So it's time to find new coping skills (like blogging). Ugh change is not easy even when you're extremely excited about what it will bring to your life.

September 6, 2011 at 7:30 am my life will change forever... actually my life changed in June 2011 when I decided that VSG was right for me but the real work begins on September 6 or maybe Aug 23 when I start my liquid diet. I'm so excited!!!

I went and got my sample pack from the doctor's office so I can begin trying different protien drinks and get prepared.

More updates to come!

My blood results are in and I have a vitamin A & D deficiency. Ugh! So I've started my vitamins per the suggestion and am now anxiously awaiting my surgery date or at least the next step.

This waiting game is killing me!! But I'm more excited about my decision then ever before. Every day that goes by helps me realize I really am making the right decision for ME!!! Can't wait to meet the new me on the outside. :)

This week I had my first appointment with the doctor to do my physical and I passed with flying colors. Then 2 days later I saw the behaviorist and though I was terrified that I would be denied because of my "food addiction" (which in all reality it is an addiction for me and I'm a very emotional eater) but nope! I passed that with flying colors. the final step this week was to meet my surgeon and discuss the surgery. And again I'm all systems go.

Friday I did my blood tests... 11 vials later I was feeling great! They should have the blood work in 5 - 10 days and then I get to the next step which I think will be the dietitian and then scheduling!! Hopefully by the fall I will be sleeved and enjoying some of the many great benefits of VSG!!

I have begun working on changing my eating habits. I have to say the most difficult habit so far has been the not drinking when i eat. And the chewing my food so thoroughly. I am always on the goal so taking time to actually chew and enjoy my food has never been a priority in my life. Hmmm... so I wonder why I'm struggling with it?? 

I am really starting to focus on eat my protein to get adjusted to eating more meats. I'm not a lover of meat but I will find some recipes that will help with that. I'm just glad I'm taking the time to prepare now so (hopefully) it's a much easier transition.