Here I go again.....

Jun 19, 2011

It's been over a year since I saw the surgeon in Great Falls.  I was stupid and didn't find a way to pay for the supervised weightloss that the insurance required.  Now I've lost my chance to have my private insurance cover any of it.

We had awesome insurnace, why did the University have to mess with it?  Arrggg.....why is everything about money?

Anyway, I should qualify for Medicare to pay for my surgery, well 80% of it (after deductible and copays).  I just don't know where the rest of it will come from.  I just know I need to do something.

Went to the doctor yesterday and they weighed me.  I have gained 10 pounds since March!!  What the heck have I been eating???  I didn't think I was doing that bad.  I didn't think I had lost any, but I thought I would be around the same.

My knees are in pain all the time now, my feet hurt, my ankles hurt, my back and neck hurt.  I don't know how I don't have diabetes or high blood pressure yet.  I know the way I'm going, it's just a matter of time.

I wish they did weight loss surgery here, but no....they don't.  The closest hospital is 2 hours away, but they aren't a "Medicare Center of Excellence" so Medicare wouldn't pay for surgery there.  I'll have to go up to Great Falls.  At least my parents live there.

I feel so hopeless right now, like nothing is ever going to get any better.  My depression is worse, probably from the weight and the pain associated with it.  I hate me.  When I see myself in a picture or in a mirror or even a reflection in glass....I hate myself.  I was so thin growing up.  What happened?

Well, I'll call the other doctor in Great Falls tomorrow, maybe they will be more helpful with info about the financial side of things.

0 Comments