devoneberhardt
You know you had WLS if.........
Nov 09, 2009
I must thank Yvonne McCarthy for this, she posted it earlier on the Main Board, but I wanted a copy................You know you've had WLS if....
"I have a date" does not mean your going out.
You have baby food in the house and no baby.
"I'm a loser" is a good thing.
All of your silverware says Gerber.
A wooden spoon isn't just for cooking.
"Welcome to the other side" doesn't include death.
New clothes fall off in a week.
You get excited about hand me downs.
The scale at Wal-Mart no longer says "one at a time please".
Going bald and getting wrinkles is a good thing.
"Just water for me please".
Hitting the "Century Mark" is actually a good thing.
You can be touched by an angel and still not be considered crazy.
Whjen your rear end no longer looks like a mudslide.
When you get excited that your incision was "only 6 inches".
When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club.
Other women are calling you "bitch" behind your back.
When you are glared at in the plus size department because you don't "belong there".
When you really don't have a thing to wear.
You have to prove you are the person on the drivers licence.
You start being in the pictures not behind the camera.
You want to hug everyone fat and hand them your surgeons card.
You are never parted from a bottle of water
When you order a doggy bag at the same time as your meal.
Being too small for your britches.
When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position them with your bra and secure with a ponytail holder.
When you go pick up your child at school and all the other kids say WOW you're mom is hot.
When you got to the mall a take the first available space instead of circling 20 minutes for one closer to the door.
You truly are a "cheap date".
When one drink makes you flipping floozy!
When you run to the door and don't hear a flapping sound.
You flip your shirt to show complete strangers your scar
Vitamins feel like a meal.
You go from a 56DDDD to 32AAA in a year and didn't have a breast reduction.
You've just lost 100 lbs and run into a high school friend who asks "did you change your hair?"
You can cross your legs... both of them
Instead of a Wonder Bra you need a Wonder Where They Went Bra
When your obsession from food turns to your scale
They no longer call 911 for the Jaws of life to extricate you from a turnstile.
No more velcro shoes
"Checking for leaks" no longer includes your panties
When your stairmaster is no longer used for drying yur fine washables
You mother says "You don't eat enough"
When your doctor looks you in the eye and says "I know you will have sucess with this."
Having sex your husband complains that your hip bones are poking him.
You can wear corderoy pants without igniting a fire
When you wave and your upper arms wave back
You safety pin your underwear
Someone phones and thinks you husband is sneaking around with some skinny mistress
Cannot blame the cat for shedding
Cancel your Lane Bryant Credit Card
3 Lean Cuisines a week and thats your total grocery purchase
The kids wonder what happened to the cake and cookie god..did he die???
1 Comment
About Me
Baltimore, MD
Location
27.9
BMI
Surgery
10/23/2009
Surgery Date
Apr 03, 2009
Member Since
