Adrienne G.

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When I look back the time has really flown by.  It's 6 months & 2 days since I attended the information session and TOMORROW I have having RNY @ 1:00 (and I think we will be on time because I am her only patient -- YAY).  House looks great, bag packed, took a few pics, made chicken parmesan for dinner (boy was that tough since I'm on liquids today, but I wanted my son to have something easy to warm up).  I am actually tired so turning in -- my girlfriend will be here @ 8:30 to make our trek to bmore.  WOW!!!!!!!!!

It's Tuesday night and I'm officially on liquids as of midnight (in 1 hr).  I caved in for a small bag of flaming hot Cheetos but I did work extra hard during my workout this morning.  Had an emotional moment with my trainer.  She is totally awesome and sometimes serves as my psychologist in addition to personal trainer.  Work went by really fast and I actually left feeling okay with the status of things.  My boss "let me know" that I could begin teleworking whenever I felt up to it -- WHAT?? I love my job BUT this time they are going to have to make it without me because I really need the time to understand my body and new tool.  Getting my hair done tomorrow which will take a big chunk of the day.  Protein shakes, water bottle, and jello all packed -- think I'll treat myself to broth for dinner.  Surgery is @ 9:00am which is a surprise because I thought Dr. Steele was teaching in the morning -- maybe she feels bad for all that drama last week.  Need to be at the hospital @ 7:00 so we will be leaving around 5:30 (I cannot stand being late and traffic is so unpredictable).  How awesome would it be to be able to go downstairs to a group meeting on Thursday evening - we will see  

Everything is a go for October 6th.  Boy did Dr. Steele really test me.  I think I took my phone everywhere for the last 3 days (YES -- even the restroom :-0) Time to pack my bag, stock the kitchen with my stuff and be sure my son has food (don't think he'll want my meal plan for the next month lol), clean the house, get my clothing in some kind of order (mostly everything is huge -- that's a good thing but I have no idea of what's in my closet).  After reading other pre-op updates, I am so grateful that I don't have to be on the liquid diet for more than 24 hrs.  Dr. Steele is really impressed with my pre-op weight loss (which is 58 lbs as of today -- I'm hoping for a nice round number like 60 by surgery day).  Need to get thank you gifts for my support person (Lucy) and my trainer (Amy) - they are awesome people and I adore both of them.  I am so excited that I cannot even think straight which is a little frustrating for me because I need to have "my ducks in a row".  Anyway... time to get moving and make some progress on my to do list.  5 more days - YAY

Hopefully I will feel better after posting (even if no one reads).  My surgeon has me dangling on the high wire and yes, some of it is my own fault.  In my original consultation back in April, I had discussed bypass as my surgical option.  During my months of documented weight loss I began to read more about the sleeve and actually thought it was a nice compromise between lap band/vsg.  After an insurance approval for WLS (no specific procedure approved) I had my pre-op with the surgeon and I told her that I wanted to do sleeve and she was fine although she reminded me of the difference.  Well, low and behold my insurance (BCBS fed) will not approve me for the sleeve.  I guess they want a boat load of co-morbidities and a higher BMI (seriously??).  So, I told the PA that I was fine with bypass.  Surgeon called me on Monday to say she was not comfortable with performing surgery on me (Which is scheduled for OCTOBER 6TH!!!!) because she thinks I am "settling" with the sleeve because of insurance.  She wanted me to write her a letter addressing the issue of my understanding of the procedure and see the nutritionist again (both of which were done yesterday).  Am I settling?  In some respect I guess I am BUT I completely understand what I am getting myself in to.  So here I sit today with phone in hand WAITING for her to call me to say okay.  Now I'm asking myself... why am I begging this woman to cut my stomach and reroute my intestine if she's not "in to it".  I cannot think of anything else.  Nutrition and psych are 100% on board and say that I have "graduated" with flying colors and understand the bypass.  I have never felt so vulnerable and out of control.  I really need an answer so I can either have the surgery or move on to a new surgeon.  This just feeds in to my control issues - I have absolutely none.  I have done everything I needed to and now I am at someone else's mercy.

Only 11 days left until my surgery.  I've spent this weekend getting everything in order - paying bills, shopping, cleaning (I can be a bit compulsive about having EVERYTHING done -- like it ever is lol).  Awesome week as far as weight loss goes down 6 lbs since my pre-op visit last Friday with Dr. Steele.  Contemplating buying a new scale because my digital at home is always off from the mechanical at the gym.  Still need to get a food scale and a few ice cube trays to use for food storage.  Plan to take my surgery day photo in a cute sweat suit and save it for an after photo (I think that's a neat idea).  I am struggling a little with not doing any "last hurrah" eating because I don't want to gain any weight (got to keep the fat off the liver).  Also having a little difficulty with telling people.  I have told my very close friends, which was a major issue for me but it went very well and they are supportive.  On to my mother -- I don't have the best relationship as she tends to be very needed  and sometimes selfish and I am extremely independent.  I honestly do not need nor require her approval but I'm not sure how to get through the next few weeks without it coming up.  She had knee surgery and is rehab.  I can make arrangements for her to get home but then we have the weeks ahead with her wanting me to do things like grocery shop, clean, and do laundry.   Things that I will not be doing for a few weeks due to my own recuperation.  Once you tell you can't take it back and I am worried that my mother will tell everybody and her circle of friends (including some of my extended family are just ignorant) and I have no time for ignorance.  Education yes, but I'm not sure that they will get it.  What to do?  Still super excited but have this one "little" thing hanging over my head.  Anesthesia appointment on Wednesday and pre-op physical on Thursday.  Trying to get gym time in and 2 trainer sessions.  This week should fly by 

What an incredible journey I have begun.  Five months ago I went to a WLS seminar and here I am today with a surgery date of October 6, 2011 -- YES that is only 14 days away :-)  I started with a plan of gastric bypass and wandered off into the world of vertical sleeve.  I had reservations about both but I think that's natural.  After being told that my insurance would cover the sleeve, I found out yesterday that they would not.  It seems that BCBS Federal wants co-morbidities like chron's before they approve sleeve.  That's fine by me -- so I'm right back where I'm obvioulsy suppose to be.  I had to find a new forum because I was on gastric sleeve and here I am.  The next 2 weeks are going to fly by.  I'm already readjusting my thought process by to bypass but I am a little nervous that I have forgotten some crucial details.  So I plan to spend this weekend reviewing all of my materials and this forum.