5 months out

Mar 24, 2010

not much has changed in thelast month.. My weight loss has slowed to a crawl.  at first it really freaked me out. then i realized i only have 25 lbs left to be right where i want to be.  i have started to think about the tommy tuck.. i think i will need it now.  I really cant expect to shed every pound in the first 6 months but it would have been nice.. I am happy with myself now.. I feel really great emotionally, i think that my years of depression were weight related becasue the person i am becoming feels happiness.. however, when i was heavy i think i sought out heavy friends as a comfort... now those same heavy friends make me feel sad and are very unsupportive.. the saying misery loves company is so true.. however at this point in my life..i just cant allow myself to be with people in a rut because i dont want to go back to that dark sad cave...isolation .. complain.. saddness.. self pitty. self dought.. I dont want to go back.. Physically i can do anything..i can run, jump, play, bend, and more. I go to the gym now and i feel strong.. i no longer feel out of place.  i am not the fat girl in the room.. i am just another person.. I find it funny when i can do a crunch and not pass out. i laugh every time i bend over and stretch.. i can see and touch my feet... the biggest thing for me this month is i can cross my legs.. how funny and simple is that.... i love who i see when i look in the mirror now.. so for me it all has been worth it.....

0 Comments