Another update

Oct 04, 2009

It has been a rough time for me mentally.  I am feeling much better though since I am going to counseling.  It is very frustrating to sit in support group meetings and hear all the great stories of losing 100 pounds in 6 months, 9 months,  or even by one year, while i am still sitting at the same weight loss.  I hear exercise more, eat less, eat different, drink more, blah, blah , blah....  BUT I will not let that deter me.  My body has never followed the rules so why should I expect it will be different now.    I DO still  go to support group and I AM very happy for those other people, just not as happy for me.  I just keep following the rules and doing what I am supposed to.  It still very much freaks me out that I can not lose weight but continue to lose clothing sizes.  For example.  IN months I have lost very little weight but have steadily gone from an 18 to a 16 to a 14 and am now able to get into some 12's.  And I have only lost about 6 pounds.  It is crazy.  But I will take whatever I can get.  Yes, I will admit it...I am jealous of the 8's and smaller sizes, and I am jealous of those that have lost 100 pounds or more but I cant make it happen for me any faster and be safe...so I trudge on.  I am happy to suddenly see a change this week and hoping I will break into the 170's.  Maybe now is my time again.  My birthday is the end of October.  I will be 51, was sick through my 50th birthday and within that week my dad died.  I am hoping this birthday will be much happier and all I want is to reach 100 pounds lost.  I am willing to take it from my presurgery weight loss which means I have to lose 6.4 pounds.  Since it took me months to lose 6 pounds I am not sure I can obtain that but I do so hope.   Either way, I will celebrate my new lease on life,  my medication free life (except all those danged vitamins), and my increased mobility.  I still believe this was the right thing for me to do and would do it again.  Many blessings to those that are on this journey with me.  
Linda 

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