I'M ON MY WAY NOW!

Dec 31, 2009

It's hard to believe I haven't been here since May?!!  I had a lot going on.  Working fulltime and then starting the rigors of preparation for bariatric surgery.  I had gotten so frustrated with tracking calories in and calories burned and seeing no progress that for a while I just stopped everything and gave up.

But something in me wouldn't let me do that for too long.  After much thought and much more prayer, I decided to take a last resort step.  I started getting ready for a sleeve gastrectomy.  I didn'g want that band in me.  I couldn't even think about it, so with sleep apnea and hight blood pressure, I qualified for this procedure.  The first day after the surgery, I laid in bed and cried and regretted having it done.  Now isn't that silly?  When I think back, I think there was apart of me that didn't really want it b/c I knew I'd have to give up a lot of comfort foods, etc.  So I started dealing with the emotional end of this whole journey long before I went though with the surgery.  I knew I was an emotional eater and I had to come to terms with that and "pay the band."

I had so many doctors to see and tests to have done and my insurance required nutrition classes for 6 months prior!

Am I still sorry?  Not one bite.  My scale is no longer lying to me!  I've finally begun to lose weight.  It wasn't the easy way out --  not by a long shot.  It was a hard decision, it's a hard change, but I am accepting it more as each day goes by.

On December 23, 2009, I went to the hospital @ 220 labs.  I now am down to 206.8.  I'm doing this for me!  And for once in my life I feel like I've done something I can be proud of.

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